Fly Hunting
August 10, 2006 – 1:03 pmI was sitting here eating lunch in the lab, and while I was reading some news online, a fly proceeds to fly about half way between my face and my monitor. One or two times of this happening is alright, but it really gets old after a dozen times or so. He would start on one window, crawling around, and then he would jump off, fly in front of my face, land on the other window, and crawl around there. He would then jump off that one, fly back in front of my face, and land on the first window again. Over and over this continued.
I put my lunch down, rummaged through the clutter on my desk to find a magazine and rolled it up. I crept out of my chair, tip-toed over to the window, and deliberately raised my rolled up magazine. The fly was crawling around on the window but then kept still.
Whack! The window rattled, and a loud boom was heard throughout the hallway. The fly jumped off the window, flew around the room a couple of times, and landed on the second window. Not easily deterred, I tip-toed over to the second window, deliberately raised the magazine, and waited for the fly to sit still.
Whack! Another loud boom reverberates through the hallway. Again, the fly jumps off the window and takes a straight shot back to the first window. I’m pissed at this point. The fly has interrupted my lunch, and I have already expended a nontrivial amount of energy trying to kill the darn thing with no success. I realize that my first two shots were a little short; the tip of the magazine didn’t quite get all the way to the fly.
One more time, I tell myself. I make my way over to the first window and for the third time deliberately raise the rolled up magazine. The fly stands still.
Whack! The window shakes yet again, but I didn’t see the fly jump off the window this time. Sure enough, I turn over the rolled up magazine, and there are fly bits all over the back of it. Relief, at last, is mine.
Does it mean I’m crappy at my job when this is the highlight of my work day? I mean, it’s not even close really. I had a clear goal, I worked hard to put myself in a position to achieve this goal, and I executed properly to make it happen. By no means can I describe my approach to research that way. Next time the boss asks, “So, what do you have for me this week?”, I’ll lead in with, “Well, we have one less fly wreaking havoc in our lab.” I’m sure that will go over well.
3 Responses to “Fly Hunting”
I’ll one-up you. I was sitting on the couch a little bit earlier and heard a buzzing, a much louder buzzing than from your typical fly. I looked at the window and saw a shadow between the window and the curtain. A BIG shadow. Luckily, it actually was *between* the curtain and the window, so one big smack on the curtain and this *HUGE* yellowjacket fell dead to the floor.
By Adam on Aug 10, 2006 at 8:26 pm
Yeah, that beats mine on a few levels:
1. It was in your home, not in your office.
2. It was a yellowjacket, not a fly.
3. It was hidden behind a curtain, not in plain sight.
Well done, good sir.
By jjk on Aug 10, 2006 at 8:30 pm
My main question is how the hell the yellowjacket got into the apartment. We never leave the doors open. Anyway, I’m glad I got it before it got into open air. Flies I can handle (in fact, I’m not too bad at catching them in mid-air), but wasps… yikes. Wasps freak me out almost as much as spiders. Bees aren’t as bad, since they tend to be less aggressive.
I was looking around and found this:
The Schmidt Sting Pain Index
The yellowjacket rates a 2 out of a possible 4: Hot and smoky, almost irreverent. Imagine WC Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue.
Paper wasps are worse: 3.0/4: Caustic & burning. Distinctly bitter aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of Hydrochloric acid on a paper cut.
By Adam on Aug 10, 2006 at 11:01 pm